she remembers...

when my maternal grandfather passed away several years ago, all of us missed him dearly. each of us, in our own way. for some of us, it was really difficult to accept that his time had come. he lived his life well, happy and full. he had many children, and even more grandchildren. he forged his own way in malaysia when he was just seventeen. he came from china, looking for better opportunities. with barely a shirt on his back, he managed to build his own business, and sent 8 out of his 10 children abroad to study. he foresaw visions ahead of his time, and encouraged them to migrate too, to build better lives for themselves.

when he passed away, my grandmother was angry, so angry that he left her alone. angry that he didn't bring her along. to cope with her anger, and her sorrow, she slowly retreated into her own world. she retreated into her world, where she only remembers certain events or things. and she is happy there. most of the time, she cannot remember if she had dinner, or perhaps she may not remember my name, even though she says my face is familiar. she remembers her youth though, when she used to fight at the water line, waiting for her ration of water. and she remembers how to speak in malay, a dialect she uses when she was younger, to converse with her neighbours from Jawi, Indonesia.

sometimes, she does not remember her husband's name, and she gets confused easily, when asked for answers. but, there is a jade ring on her finger, which she never takes off. when i jokingly said i'll trade my silver ring for hers, she refuses. "it's my engagement ring, you see. your grandfather and i exchanged rings for our engagement, and i can't exchange it with you."

she does not remember the time, nor the place. she recognises her children and grandchildren faces, eventhough she may not be able to place the name correctly. but she remembers...she remembers the love of her life, and the ring that signifies it. she remembers....