what do u do when u are dying to say something but u have to bite ur tongue?
what do u do when u long to do something but u have to control urself?
u go to a wall, or u take a hard piece of wood, then u start banging ur head against it. it's a typical course of action that most people take when in similar situations. perhaps its guilt or circumstances or even your own self confidence, the reasons many, the end result the same. we can't explain, nor we want to, nor we care to. sometimes we hold ourselves back, for we don't want to hurt someone, sometimes we hold back, to spite someone. sometimes, u hold back for the want never came, sometimes u hold back, for u want too much.
it's not good to hold back, the experts say. u should let it out, let the frustrations fly. whatever the experts say, it doesn't make a difference to what u are going thru. for despite the stomach ulcers that u get from all that holding back, or the insomnia, or the "funny illnesses" no doctor can diagnose or treat, the only relief u get from scientific studies are the antacids and a funny terminology of ur condition.
and the emotions turn to sour milk, and ur intentions dry n shrivel and what's left of ur dreams are only dusts in ur memory.
what's bugging me...? excuse me while i go find my wall n start banging my head. i...er...i can't say...
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